This might sound pretentious or trippy. But it’s just a thing I haven’t found a proper answer for.

My paternal parts of the family are all dead, no aunts, uncles or cousins alive any longer. My maternal parts of the family suck, they seriously suck, no joke. I decided not to procreate (and had a “few discretions” regarding this) because I didn’t want to pass the shitty genes, behaviour or guilt onto another generation.

I have an ex, some relations ago. And I really loved his mother, as a mother. I was a train wreck at one time, and she saved me and took care of me. I don’t care that she isn’t my real mother. But this was several years ago.

What really hurts is that my siblings and cousins tell me that what I felt for her was fake, as she is not a blood relative. As I have helped her more than I would ever have helped anyone else. I love her, but is it true love to love someone as a mother if they aren’t your biological mother?

  • DogMuffins@discuss.tchncs.de
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    1 year ago

    This is a dumb analogy that just doesn’t apply here.

    OP is saying that she has unique feelings for this person but no point of reference.

    As in… we both know the sun is “yellow” but IDK if your yellow is the same as my yellow.

    • JesterRaiin@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      Your analogy is weak.

      It doesn’t matter how you perceive the color of Sun as long as we both agree to call it “yellow”.

      • DogMuffins@discuss.tchncs.de
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        1 year ago

        Sure mate. That’s pretty much exactly my answer to OP.

        if loving this woman as a mother feels right to you then that’s enough.