I have similar feelings and I was raised in a very controlling home. It took me years to realize the environment I grew up in wasn’t healthy, because that was my “normal”. It could be the same for you, but only you and/or a mental health professional could say for sure.
With all that he’s putting on the line, David Grusch appears to believe what he’s saying. But is it possible the documents David Grusch came across were fabricated? Would the US government have any incentive to fabricate these records and keep them highly classified?