I’d probably go back to around 2000 and tell myself that my stupid decisions were going to catch up to me in about 24 years, and they will definitely cost me the relationship I have with only person in this world who had ever genuinely loved me, and that it will drive her mad and she will react in a most brutal and callous way.

I would remind myself that the way I think other people are feeling is almost always wrong, to some degree, and that i should listen better to her about her feelings while I still have a chance to salvage what was once true love.

I would explain that, if I’m not careful, I will misinterpret everything she says about her feelings, and i will lose all my friends and hobbies, one by one, trying to be someone for her that she doesn’t even want.

I would describe the way it feels to be with her, then illustrate the way it will feel when she starts dating other guys while you beg her to please work with you on your relationship, and that it would already be too late no matter how much you want it to work.

I would suggest that, if I decide to proceed while ignoring all my other advice, then I should at least not buy a house with her in 2023 when she is so insistent. Just hold out for one more year before making that mistake.

She wanted to be my forever person, and i didn’t know how to deserve that. We were fucking teenagers when we got together, and neither of us knew how to be. We were just spitballing.

And I’m a fucken dumdum.

I probably wouldn’t listen to me anyway

Before the toilet, there was Little Big Skibidi

This will probably actually make it more confusing, but it’s still worth it, and it’s a Brazillion times better than skibidi toilet could ever dream…

Imperial, obviously: F(reedom)T(ons) and fractions thereof. 1FT is the amount of data that it takes to store the entire King James edition of the New Testament and the Bill of Rights as a PDF.

The kom.bu.cha! mush.room! peo.ple! sit.ting a.round all day!

Perhaps that anyone of any religion is not also atheist.

Anyone in any theology believes in only their deity, but doesn’t believe in the hundreds of other recorded, historical deities.

Even the theists are atheists.

I don’t think it’s fair to say 40% of Americans.

He only had ~74M votes in the last election, and he still lost. That equates generously to around 1/4 of all Americans (329M), back then. If the support numbers haven’t shifted, that’s still significantly under 25% of Americans that are too stupid to be left alone with a box of crayons.