I am once again dumping my raw thoughts on Lemmy and asking your opinion on them.
My first dog (and pet in general) is nowhere near the age of me needing to think about putting her down, but having a dog has introduced me to the world of opinions on whether they should be put down when they get too old.
I’ve read a lot of very strong pro-euthanasia pet owner opinions, even going as far as accusing people refusing to put down their pets as “cruel” or actively wanting their pets to suffer. It really seems like a majority of pet owners, at least in the English speaking world, think putting their pets down is something you should always do when their bodies deteriorate past a certain point, and every time this is brought up you get a lot of emotional comments shaming anyone who doesn’t subscribe to that philosophy.
The core argument being made seems to be that when their health conditions pile up past a point, it’s not “worth” letting the pet live anymore, supposedly for their sake. But when I think about it further, I ask how can you be sure? All animals want to keep living, that’s literally why animals evolved brains in the first place, to keep their bodies alive for as long as possible. How can you, who is not the pet, say for sure they would prefer to die than keep living? You can’t ask them, and you can’t get in their mind to determine how much they still appreciate being alive. Even the oldest, sickest pet will still make an effort to keep themselves alive however they can: eating, drinking water, moving out of the way of danger, etc. As far as I know, no animal (at least the animals we keep as pets) have an instinct to just give up and stop going through the motions of life past a certain age. Doesn’t that imply they always want to live?
I consider the decision to no longer live past a certain age and certain number of health problems to be a uniquely human thing, and it doesn’t feel right to impose that on a pet who probably doesn’t have those thoughts. Even with humans, we refrain from making that decision for them. Someone who’s in a coma isn’t eligible for euthanasia just because they haven’t expressed a desire to live, and the most their family can legally do is to stop actively keeping them alive with technology and let them die naturally. But if they don’t die right after taking them off life support, you can’t just straight up kill them, they need to die by themselves. Why isn’t this philosophy applied to pets, who can never consent to euthanasia? You don’t have to keep subjecting your pet to more and more invasive treatments just to extend their lives by a small amount, but at the same time, what gives you the moral right to unilaterally decide when they’re done with living? Why is letting your pet die naturally in the comfort of their own home seen as cruel, while choosing for them when they should die is considered humane?
What do you think? I genuinely don’t know how I feel about this but want to understand the problem and where I stand on it before my dog gets old enough for these things to apply.
I just wanna throw my own anecdote in here too; I was also really uncomfortable and uncertain making the decision but my dog got to the point where he was 17, blind, partially deaf, had nose polyps, and wasnt keeping food down or able to control his bladder for the last few days. I knew he was suffering and I didnt want his last days to be spent laying limp on a blanket in the living room hungry and in pain and he had started getting cognitive decline too and was starting to act scared because of it combined with his blindness.
The vet came over, i ordered mcdonalds chicken nuggets specifically just for my dog even if he wasnt able to eat them all, he got wrapped up in his favourite fuzzy blanket and the vet gave him a hero dose of the best doggy morphine im assuming money can buy
OP I knew I made the right choice when I saw aaaaall the pain leave his body when the painkillers hit. I was so used to him looking like the cryptkeeper I had forgotten what it looked like to see my dog without any pain in his joints or anxiety from his blindness. He transformed back into the happy little dog I knew right in front of my eyes and then he gently died being held by the people he loves with a belly full of nugs instead of wasting away for god knows how much longer.
It can feel wrong to make that decision for someone else but when I saw how much pain he had truly been carrying this whole time for the last parts of his life I realized it really was mercy and if I were in the same situation I would want that for me.
Unfortunately sometimes waiting CAN take too long. My dog was suffering and I wish I had seen it sooner but I waited and waited because he still had “good” days even if those good days were fewer and farther between. It hurts to think that he may have suffered when he didnt have to which is a harder thing to live with imho than choosing to guide him out gently.
They say that by the time they let you see how bad it is, it’s past time. It’s impossible to know the exact right day, especially when you see the little perk ups, the tiny tail wags, laying in the sun,… We do the best we can. I’m sorry for your loss.
Thanks, and im sorry for yours too. It’s hard, I try to frame it as opening up the opportunity to give another dog a loving home and I look forward to having many dogs in my life who all live hopefully the best and longest possible lives it’s just tough knowing you sign up for like a 15 year cycle of incredibly intense attachment and emotional friendship capped by utter devastation :')
Like I think I get why theres that “dad who doesnt want pets” trope… its not that they dont like them, they just know theyll love them so much