I’m a perfectionist and I realized I’ve been making life too hard for myself. Choosing a low bar for success but keeping the ceiling high has felt like a much healthier approach.
“Anything worth doing is worth doing poorly” I try to remind myself, with a history of postponing things, and not wanting to imperfectly do things. Rarely I’ve regretted doing to my current ability, but countless times leaving things undone.
The consultant’s proverb: done is better than perfect
Between a pragmatist and a perfectionist, one of them sleeps soundly and knows what he’s doing tomorrow.
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Any work or study done during an all-nighter is a waste.
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If you meet someone and all they do is talk about themselves, they won’t be a good friend.
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Nobody really cares how you look or what you wear. And anyone who does has bigger issues they would rather not deal with.
Depends. When I was in art school, I regularly worked for 36 hours straight, and at least once for 72 hours straight. But it’s studio work, where you’re actually making a <<thing>>; it never would have worked to have been trying to read Marx/Engels or Hegel and expect to have any kind of comprehension.
Yeah engineering work on an all nighter is worse than not, but you gotta do what you gotta do and it’s physically there then.
Though writing for a classics class is the other area I’ve found all nighters to be acceptable. Though that was as a 19 year old on methylphenidate.
Any work or study done during an all-nighter is a waste.
Depends. I did some of my best work at this time (private project. not for my actual workplace).
Same. That’s when everyone else goes to sleep and actually leaves you time to focus on your work.
I sense ADHD (source: am ADHD)
Maybe ;)
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Double entry bookkeeping.
Who was committing fraud?
Basic necessities arent a given and one should b grateful for em
Grateful to who?
I think you can just be grateful to have or experience something. Like you can’t be grateful to anyone for a full moon, but you can be grateful that you saw it.
Yeah, I didn’t know people were just giving out basic necessities. I’ve been allowing people to exploit my labor for nothing this whole time?
The people who give them to you?
It’s OK to only do what you KNOW you are capable of doing. Too many people hurt themselves trying to push themselves too hard, when they just aren’t ready yet.
Grace Periods.
I’m glad I know them now, because for the longest time, I thought I was in a fucked situation whenever my finances were tight. Like if I was due a bill and my pay cannot cover it because of the dates being different. It used to make think that I had to take a hit and just roll with it. But no, some of my bills allow me a brief grace period where I can gather resources in time. Sometimes I’ll even stretch my money beyond some grace periods if it means that I can upkeep some resources then just pay the difference later.
The sunk cost fallacy is a very easy way to get stuck being miserable.
Sometimes a drastic change might be painful at the time but will be much better for you overall.
Definitely agree with this one
The thing that comes only with age is: to not give a fuck.
When we learn that it doesn’t matter we can all be little old people who are purple mohawk headed, wearing clashing neon adidas jumpsuit with zebra primted boas.
I only learned this a few weeks ago at 40 years old, now my hair is blue, both my ears are pierced and I’m a lot happier. I told my 19 year old daughter that “what will people think?” has been my mantra, now it’s “fuck 'em”
"at 20, you care the world what everyone thinks of you
At 40 you learn to not care what anyone thinks of you
At 60, you realize nobody has been thinking about you at all, the whole time."
If you quit worrying what people think of you, you’ll realize how seldom they do.
Hey, I’m you and you’re me! I also just turned 40 in late September. Happy belated birthday, ya old fart!
There’s always someone who will look at your life telling you you’re doing everything wrong. And you know what? That’s fine. It really doesn’t matter.
That there’s a opensource version of reddit!!
Nah I feel like I hopped on right on time. When this first started out there wasn’t too much content.
That it doesn’t matter what other people think of me as long as I’m happy.
It doesn’t matter what other people think, full stop. The world is full of people who think they know better. ignore them.
I think there’s a balance. if you really don’t care anymore, you’ll become a bad person that nobody wants around
Your own happiness is more important that somebody else’s happiness.
Not to say you shouldn’t be nice or help people, or invest in other people’s growth.
But don’t do it to the detriment of your own.
Being a good person is a weakness in capitalist civilizations.
@UltraGiGaGigantic It’s the only way to fight, though.
Oh, please. It’s most definitely not.
Agree. If you were 100% capitalist and everything you did was about money, then maybe. But most of us balance that for the benefit of our mental health and, well, not being a dick.
I know plenty of assholes who aren’t rich, so I don’t think there’s any correlation.
@bstix You don’t have to be rich to be an asshole, but you almost certainly have to be an asshole to get rich.
Its a super power, actually. Everytime I meet one they impact my life so deeply I can’t help but admire them and completely swoon.
I’m glad people still admire altruism. I have ADHD and a weird symptom of it is a “rigid moral compass” and a “strong sense of righteousness”.
I had pretty cynical and rich parents that were very skeptical of my worldview and attitude. I sort of accepted that I’d remain alone by " doing the right thing". Glad to see it may not be that way 🤞
It’s few and far between. A good person isn’t a perfect person. It’s someone who does the hard thing because it’s the right thing. People also fall in and out of being their best selves. That’s exceptable as well. So, if you truly want to experience a genuinely good person, you have to trust they are before they can show you. If you want to be one don’t do it by following some strict rules set. Look for places where you can help then just be yourself.
If all I’ve ever known of you is the best side of you, flawed and all, to me, you were nothing but good.
I don’t feel too late to learn anything so far.
Don’t buy the cow if you’re lactose intolerant.
Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free
That property has more rights and protections than people do.
The value of human life, in reality, is much lower than I thought it would be.
Laws and rights are only as good as the people & mechanisms that enforce them. A piece of paper doesn’t protect you, people do.
That people often prefer a comforting delusion over the truth, even if it hurts them in the long run.